Checking in on New Year’s resolutions and reframing goals to benefit mental health

A NEW YEAR OFTEN COMES WITH NEW CHALLENGES. YOU START OFF STRONG WITH A LIST OF RESOLUTIONS AND GOALS, RIGHT? BUT SOMETIMES YOU LOSE STEAM SOONER THAN EXPECTED. SO JOINING ME NOW TO HELP EVERYONE REALLY KIND OF NAVIGATE THEIR PROGRESS REPORT AND MAYBE PRESS THE RESET BUTTON IS LICENSED MENTAL HEALTH COUNSELOR. CHANTAL. SO GOOD TO SEE YOU. YOU TOO. MEREDITH AS ALWAYS. OKAY. THIS IS SUCH A GREAT REMINDER. SO WHAT MAKES THIS TIME OF YEAR SO CHALLENGING? I FEEL LIKE IT’S JUST HARD. LIKE WE’RE IN THIS COLD, LIKE MID JANUARY, ALMOST LATE JANUARY. IT’S KIND OF LIKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’RE IN A RUT, BUT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE MOTIVATED AND LIKE STICKING TO THOSE RESOLUTIONS. WELL, THAT’S SO HARD WITH EXPECTATION BECAUSE I THINK THERE’S SO MUCH DEPLETION SOCIALLY, ECONOMICALLY, YOU KNOW, THERE’S SO MUCH THAT HAPPENED IN THE PRIOR MONTH WITH THE HOLIDAYS AND ALL THE CELEBRATION. AND NOW IT’S BACK TO ROUTINE, BACK TO THE NORM. ON TOP OF IT ALL, THE EXPECTATIONS OF WHAT WE SHOULD DO OR WHAT WE SHOULD PLAN FOR CAN SET A LOT OF PRESSURE. IT’S KIND OF A NONSENSE MONTH. IT’S A TOUGH MONTH FOR PEOPLE. THERE’S NO CELEBRATIONS IN JANUARY. THERE’S NOTHING GOING ON. NO YOU’RE RIGHT. OKAY, THAT REALLY DOES HIT HOME BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE SO MANY PEOPLE DO PUT THAT PRESSURE ON THEMSELVES. AND THEN YOU’RE LIKE, OKAY, I’M NOT ACCOMPLISHING THESE GOALS. SO WHAT ARE SOME OF THE SIGNS THEN THAT WE SHOULD, YOU KNOW, IF YOU’RE STRUGGLING, WHAT SHOULD I BE PAYING ATTENTION TO? OR HOW DO I KIND OF GET OUT OF THAT AND GET BACK ON TRACK? WELL, IF THOSE GOALS THAT WE HAD SET ARE JUST THINGS THAT WE DREAD OR DON’T REALLY WANT TO DO, WE HAVE TO REALLY REEVALUATE WHY WE DECIDED TO SET THOSE GOALS. AND IF WE’RE NOT MEETING THEM, THERE’S A REASON FOR THAT. WE’VE LOST OUR PURPOSE. WE’VE LOST OUR MEANING IN THAT. SO WE REALLY KIND OF NEED TO LOOK AT THAT AND KIND OF RESET WHERE WE’RE AT. OKAY, SO HELP ME GET BACK ON TRACK THEN. SO WHAT DO WE DO IF SOMEONE’S WATCHING THIS THINKING LIKE, ALL RIGHT, YOU’RE RIGHT. SO WHAT DO I DO NOW? WHAT’S NEXT? WELL, WE NEED TO GET REAL AND STOP LYING TO OURSELVES. I THINK A LOT OF TIMES WE LIE TO OURSELVES BASED ON THE COMPARISONS OF EVERYONE ELSE, WHERE EVERYONE’S SETTING NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS AND IT SHOULD BE GO TO THE GYM. IT SHOULD BE GET A BETTER JOB, IT SHOULD BE ALL THESE THINGS. BUT WHAT IS THE WHY? WHY ARE WE DOING WHAT WE’RE DOING? WHY DO WE WANT TO CHANGE? AND WHAT IS OUR PURPOSE BEHIND IT? BECAUSE IF WE DON’T HAVE PURPOSE AND MEANING, WE WILL NOT DO ANYTHING. IT’S JUST WORDS ON PAPER THAT WE WROTE DOWN. BUT WE’LL NEVER DO IT. YOU’RE SO RIGHT. BUT I WANTED TO MENTION, JUST SO SOME OF THE THINGS THAT YOU HAD SAID THAT, YOU KNOW, STAY ON TRACK, GET REAL, MAKE THIS PLAN, ASK FOR HELP, ALL OF THESE THINGS. I LOVE THIS GRAPHIC BECAUSE IT REALLY DOES. YOU KNOW, IT PAINTS A GOOD PICTURE. DO SOMETHING YOURSELF TO TO BROADEN YOUR PERSPECTIVE. KIND OF TAKE US THROUGH THAT. JUST THE DECLUTTERING, THE REFRAME OF THE RESOLUTIONS. WELL, AFTER WE STOP LYING TO OURSELVES AND WE GET REAL, REALLY MAKING AND FIGURING OUT WHAT IS IT REALLY THAT WE WANT TO SEE CHANGE AND WHERE IS OUR DRIVE AND OUR FOCUS? AND CAN WE REFRAME SOME OF THOSE NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS THAT FAILED? YOU KNOW, IF IT’S I WANT TO LOSE 20 POUNDS, MAYBE IT’S NOT. MAYBE IT’S I WANT TO FEEL BETTER AND HEALTHY AND STRONG. HOW DO WE REFRAME THOSE? SO THAT’S HOW WE MAKE A PLAN AND CHANGE THOSE EXPECTATIONS OF OURSELVES SO THAT WE CAN BE SUCCESSFUL IN THE NEW YEAR. OKAY, CHANTAL, WHAT ABOUT IF YOU KNOW, THIS IS WE DID LIKE A GRATITUDE JAR AND I’M LIKE, OKAY, EVERYONE, WE’RE GOING TO PUT IN WHAT WE’RE GRATEFUL FOR AND WHAT WE’RE THANKFUL FOR IN THIS, THIS YEAR, OKAY? AND THEN AT THE END OF THE YEAR, I WANT TO LOOK AT THAT AND KIND OF LIKE READ WHAT EVERYONE IS SAYING. SO I GUESS MY QUESTION WOULD BE, HOW DO YOU JUST MAYBE SHIFT THE PERSPECTIVE? YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? TO BE THANKFUL FOR WHAT YOU DO HAVE AND NOT ALWAYS HAVING TO WANT MORE OR BE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? LIKE, EVERYBODY WANTS TO BE THEIR BEST VERSION. BUT I THINK SOMETIMES IT CAN BE LIKE THIS DOWNWARD SPIRAL SOMETIMES, WELL, LEARNING FROM OTHER PEOPLE’S EXPERIENCES IS REALLY IMPORTANT FOR GRATITUDE. I MEAN, I WAS JUST TALKING WITH YOUR PRODUCER EARLIER AND SHE WAS SAYING SHE WAS SO THANKFUL THAT SHE HAD CHRISTMAS OFF. IN MY MIND, I WAS THINKING, I ALWAYS HAVE CHRISTMAS OFF. SO I WASN’T EVEN GRATEFUL FOR THAT BECAUSE IT WASN’T EVEN ON MY RADAR. SO WHEN WE TALK TO PEOPLE AND WE LEARN FROM EXPERIENCES, WHEN WE TRAVEL, WHEN WE TRY NEW THINGS, WHEN WE BROADEN OUR PERSPECTIVE AND GET OUT OF THE BOX AND THE RUT, WE REALIZE WE DO HAVE SO MUCH TO BE GRATEFUL FOR AND SO MUCH MORE TO THE WORLD THAN JUST OUR LITTLE SPACE. I LOVE THAT, OKAY, AND HOW CAN WE HELP OTHERS, OUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER, OUR KIDS JUST KIND OF LIKE, YOU KNOW, GET THROUGH THIS PROCESS OF LIKE WHAT YOU SAID, STICK WITH THE RESOLUTION, REALIZING WHAT YOU DO HAVE TO BE GRATEFUL FOR, REALLY WATCHING THEM, WATCHING THEM AND SEEING WHAT MOTIVATES THEM, WHAT DRIVES THEM, WHAT LIGHTS THEM UP AND ENCOURAGING THEM IN THAT NOT WHAT THEY FEEL LIKE THEY SHOULD DO. BUT WHY DO THEY WANT TO DO SOMETHING AND REALLY JUST HELPING THEM AND SUPPORTING THEM AND BEING THEIR ACCOUNTABILITY PARTNER? THAT’S REALLY HELPFUL TOO. OKAY. ALL RIGHT. GOES GOES BOTH WAYS. RIGHT. AND IF SOMEONE IS WATCHING THIS TODAY THEY WANT TO REACH OUT TO YOU. HOW CAN THEY MAKE CONTACT WITH MY WEBSITE IS BOB WELLNESS LLC. SO THAT’S HOW THEY CAN REACH OUT. OKAY, CHANTAL, THANK YOU SO MUCH. AND ALL OF THIS INFORMATION AS WELL